Guest Post: My Healing Journey As My Life’s Path

Guest Post: My Healing Journey As My Life’s Path

It has been just over four years since my last post. In that time, I continued my collaboration with Anne on this site. I have also focused on my family and moving ahead with my life after my mom’s passing in 2019. In the interim years, there have been some important milestones–house renovations, job changes, an in-person reunion with Anne in the summer of 2023, and, this year, my oldest child graduating high school and going off to college, and my youngest child reaching the teen years. Looking ahead, I am three years away from the milestone birthday ending in zero and five years away from my second and youngest child leaving the nest. Looking at this arc in time, I ask myself, “How do I define my sense of purpose and healing journey as my life takes a new path?”

I have always been a fan of Shakespeare and as he wrote in As You Like It:

“ All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players;

They have their exits and their entrances;

And one man in his time plays many parts,”

How does one define their many parts as they shift throughout their life? How does one chart the trajectory of the arc of their life and give it meaning? For me, the answer to these questions comes from my study of Modern Criticism in college. It was then that I was introduced to the work of Emmanuel Levinas. Mr. Levinas and his work would profoundly affect how I define myself and my view of the world. Mr. Levinas was a student of phenomenology and, in his work, spread the idea of “ethics as first philosophy”. In his writing, Mr. Levinas spoke of our defining ourselves by the presence of the “Other”. When we face the “Other” we feel an infinite responsibility even though the “Other” is unknowable.

I am reminded of another favorite quote by Shakespeare from Romeo and Juliet, “My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite.” It is our relationships that are the nuclear reactor producing the fuel that propels our lives forward as well as the raw materials we need to give it structure and define it.

So, coming down from the heady talk of Shakespeare and Mr. Levinas, how do I apply these principles in my daily life? In the increasingly digital world we find ourselves in, I take pleasure in the analog – Feeling and holding someone’s gaze as I speak with them; Making sure my smile and warmth come across in my voice when I am on the phone with someone; Coming into contact with and listening to many different points of view and trying to stay open to ideas even though I may not understand or agree; Practicing humility; Celebrating our differences and leaning into the discomfort that can come from not knowing; Slowing down and looking at things with curiosity and wonder; Accepting change. 

My healing journey is not a singular path but a river with many smaller tributaries comprised of my life’s experiences. It is not a singular view but a multi-faceted kaleidoscopic one. It is many lenses or points of view through which to examine my experience and define my relationship with the “Other”. It provides an infinite pool of inspiration, empathy, and love. It is the resource I draw upon when I might feel disillusioned or tired and not want to do the work or continue on the path. It is the responsibility I feel when I look into my children’s, husband’s, and friend’s eyes. It is at the heart of my desire to help others and provides the creative sparks to search for solutions. In that feeling of responsibility to the “Other”, I seek to define myself and give my life meaning. I am also the “Other” to someone else’s self, and in my healing, I can bring a rich dialogue to that relationship.

Looking towards the horizon of the future on my healing journey/life’s path, I feel energized and optimistic. I know big changes are on the horizon, but I am flexible and open to change.  I am ready to explore new paths and see where they lead me.

-Meg Calvert-Cason